Life is like a box of chocolates

Forrest Gump’s classic tag line:
Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.
And you don’t.

You always want to go with the best, most realistic, safest, most secure option.

Safe. Guaranteed.

Not always.

I’ve been at the same company for 24 years. Over half of my life. Of course, I’ve thought about changing jobs more than once through the years – sometimes out of boredom, sometimes out of financial justice. But I always came back to the same decision – stay. I love my job and the company, and the people I work with are great. I never once imagined that I would be given a choice: a completely different tech job at the same company or, there’s the door.

I’m not sure what my final decision will be. I’ve vacillated back and forth about a hundred times already. And I’ve been through the entire array of emotions. I keep stopping and dwelling on the “hurt”. I know it’s nothing personal against me. They’re outsourcing my job and it really is the most economical, efficient way to go. It’s a benefit to the company. It’s just that I’m a casualty. Business, not personal.

However, as I keep going through it in my mind, it comes back to feeling like a personal hit. I know I’ll get over it. I know I’ll get past it. But for me, right now, I need to spend some time there – in that pain. The more time I spend with it and realize it, the less impact it will have on me in the long run. It’s hard and it sucks. But it’s the best thing for me. I know that.

You need to spend time in the hardest feelings of life. You will be a better, rounder, more complete person by embracing the feelings – tough or easy – and moving past it. Embrace the moment. Live in the now. Carpe Diem. Sorry, but in my current state, that just pisses me off. I know logically that all of this makes sense. But it’s not an easy place to reach, nor to reside in.

 

Wish me luck!